Abraham, Rachel, Soren and Liam. Our life together in Smalltown, Idaho.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

What the World Needs

What does the world need?

I've been asking myself this question a lot lately, trying to figure out how I might live my life in a way that would maximize the good that I bring into the world. I believe that love is at the core of everything that is meaningful, and that we are given life so that we might learn about love: to learn how to love, to learn to experience love, and, in so doing, to find joy in living. However, it's difficult to know how this belief can be translated into my life. I know it's important to bring love and joy into the world; however, I wonder how much love is enough. How do I know when I'm doing enough?

Sometimes I'm just so overwhelmed by the world's neediness. There is so much need. There are people who are starving, who are afraid for their lives, who are sick and need medical assistance. There are children--sweet, innocent, precious children-- who have suffered unspeakable horrors, sometimes at the hands of those they rely on for safety and love. There are people who are lonely and isolated. There are others who are lost in a pit of depression and sadness. Many feel overburdened and insufficient. There are some who have sufficient food, shelter, and company-- but who feel still empty, hollow, lacking in something. There are needs, needs, needs, needs, and I'm not sure which ones should be prioritized. How do you measure an act of goodness? Is it better to sponsor an orphan or support AIDS research? Is it more moral to spend your time composing a symphony or building a school in Afghanistan? How much time can I spend on activities that I personally find interesting or pleasurable without regard for improving the well-being of others? Shouldn't there be some sort of goodness-o-meter into which you can describe an act and it will give you a moral grade? "Practicing the piano for personal pleasure...C+." "Making a donation of hard-earned money to the homeless shelter....B." "Gossiping with the neighbor....D-." Then you could go throughout your day with confidence, selecting "A+" activities only and knowing that you were doing everything you could to make the world a better place.

But it's hard to know the far-reaching effects of the things we do, and sometimes an act of love isn't as overt as volunteering at the soup kitchen or tutoring a kid in spelling. I believe that math, engineering, invention, philosophy, science, and art can all be used to lift lives, increase happiness, and create love.

For example, my life has been changed in meaningful ways by art....a series of paintings by Pilar Pobil, a song by Live, a novel by Toni Morrison. But how important is it that my life be improved on a personal level by art when there are children who don't have enough to eat? There are people who have needs on all the levels of need, but is it ethical to pursue self-actualization when some people haven't even stabilized sources of their basic physiological needs? Should Beethoven have dedicated his time and energy to helping little children, rather than lost in practice or scribbling away madly at musical manuscripts? Has his music moved enough lives to compensate for the deaths of the little ones he could have saved? And sure, creating great art is one thing...but what about producing mediocre entertainment? Is that a waste of life? Or is there a need for mediocre entertainment? A need that should be prioritized over visiting your widowed neighbor?

And where do I prioritize my own happiness? Sometimes it feels like I seek after my own happiness and pleasure at the expense of others' well-being. Is it right that Abe and I spend eighty dollars a month on eating out when we could eat at home and donate the extra money to the Make a Smile foundation? Is it okay to be spending time posting on my blog when I could be writing a grant proposal to get funds for the Domestic Violence center?

Is everyone's happiness of infinite importance? If you've made yourself happy and met all your own needs, is that enough? Or if you've worked to serve and care for your immediate family members, is that enough? If you've watched over a needy neighbor, have you done enough? If you donated fifty dollars a month to the Perpetual Education fund, is the world sufficiently better for your presence? What if you spend your whole life working to build up a business empire and then, upon your death, use your fortune to create foundations to improve education for youth in your own country? Is that sufficient? What if you raise two healthy, productive children who will go on to do the same thing? Was your existence worthwhile? What if you just smiled at everyone you saw? What if you just smiled at half the people you saw? What if you half-smiled at some people in the grocery store once?

Howard Thurman famously said, "Don't ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive." Which is nice. But, I dunno, shoveling crap out of my parent's neighbor's house didn't make me feel particularly alive, but it made her home a better place for a while. Visiting my lonely uncle doesn't make me feel vibrant, but he enjoys the company. I don't get a particular thrill of joy from making my little boys breakfast every morning, but I think it's good for them and for our family.

Is there really enough diversity in the world that if everyone just did what made them "come alive," that there would be opportunities for every need to be met?

10 comments:

Pamela said...

The best way for me to comment on this is to say that each of us is one person and what we do in life, such as someone composing a grest work of music or literature helps out those whom they reach. You worked at Harbor House, you know the Serenity Prayer...
God grant me the serentity to accept the things I can not change,
The Courage to change the things I can,
And the Wisdom to know the difference.
What is interesting to me is that I kind of had this conversation with my mother the other day. How can one person believe that praying will help to alieviate the the problems we face? We pray for a solution, but we never seem to get a response. Sitting and watching the news about all the evil happenings in the world is very disheartening, but what is it that you can do? You can give yourself to what you love and enjoy and pass that on to your children in the hopes that one day, they too will reach out and help. Life is full of these difficult questions, that are hard to find an answer to. But if you do your best, then that is all that you ccan do.
As the famous saying goes, "God doesn't give you more than you can handle". Well, in some aspects this is true. Don't take on a task that may not be meant for you. Be the person that person you wish to see others be, by being the kind, loving, and good friend and mother and wife you are. That is how you make your difference in the world. ;)

Nick Wheeler said...

I keep typing comments then erasing them. Because I keep running into the same questions you did. Good post. I love you.

heidi said...

I love that Nick had the courage (and honesty, humility? I guess I'm unsure exactly what it takes but these qualities seem close to what allows a person to do what he did) to NOT have answers, to sit with the questions.

That's hard to do, I think. I like knowing that I'm right. That I needn't be uncomfortable because I KNOW, and, if everyone would just listen g-d-it, everything would be just fine. Thank you.

Umm... So, I find the dilemma you pose intriguing and plan to ponder it further.

And, since I admire your honesty--maybe I can have the guts to respond in kind. You title this, "What the World Needs" but you only mention the problems of people. Those are, clearly, huge, all on their own, but... it seems to me that part of what the world needs is for there to be an end to... well, it's too painful for me to say, I guess I'll just allude to it. Extinction, permanent destruction of unique habitats, abuse, neglect, intentional cruelty, lifetimes of suffering (in factory farms, in labs, and more), the whole abyss of pain that all sentient beings are vulnerable to. But that only human beings seem capable of causing on such an... indescribable scale.

So... I'm not sure there was anything the least bit intentional in your omission, I just kept getting hung up on that concern. Although maybe... I dunno, some people seem to get mad at people who care about nonhuman life. Hopefully I don't raise that ire. (On the part of your readers, I mean.)

Maybe now I can get past that concern in order to properly partake of my planned pondering.

Oh, and, hey--as always, I'm so glad you do this.

Kate said...

I have no idea what to say but I wanted you to know I really enjoyed this.

Rachel said...

Thank you all so much for commenting.

(Heidi, I've too much to say here, so I'll send you an email.)

Jennifer said...

Rachel,

I just spent the past three weeks with my three young children nursing a dying man on his sofa. My services were needed for only 1-2 hours a day. It wasn't really that difficult. Yes, our lifestyle was altered and I did spend much of the rest of my informing those you were curious about the situation. Some people were helpful, but most were just passively curious. However, 1-2 hours a day for three weeks was a small contribution to big picture. The man had no family. The friends he referred to were not to be found. The payee on his account was MIA so the man had no money to purchase socks, food, or other items he needed/wanted. It was a rather bleak and dismal picture.

However, in the midst of this a group of individuals learned to love and serve a stranger in ways I never believed I would witness. It was one of the most tender, and loving experiences in my life. I have become a better person because of this experience. In the process I have also improved as a mother and wife.

I am not out to change the world, Rachel. However, I am dedicated to reaching out and helping those around me any way I can. You see, when I look at the big picture I get overwhelmed and yell, "why isn't anyone doing anything about this?!?" However, if I'm busy working in my little realm in life and constantly seeking to stretch my perimeter than I'm more apt to trust that someone else is doing the same thing in their realm.

I have a quote hanging above my kitchen sink;
"A man filled with the love of God, is not content with blessing his family alone, but ranges through the whole world, anxious to bless the whole human race."

One day I might be courageous and ambitious enough to "range through the whole world" but for now I seek for opportunities around me. This year has been expectionally good. Sarah, 5 years old from Mongolia. 23 year old, Bilguun also from Mongolia. Pops, 78 from Chicago. Brian, 53, living in Florida. Well, maybe I'll reach the whole world while it is busy passing though my neighborhood!

Have a good night, dear.

Jennifer said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Rachel,

I just spent the past three weeks with my three young children nursing a dying man on his sofa. My services were needed for only 1-2 hours a day. It wasn't really that difficult. Yes, our lifestyle was altered and I did spend much of the rest of my informing those you were curious about the situation. Some people were helpful, but most were just passively curious. However, 1-2 hours a day for three weeks was a small contribution to big picture. The man had no family. The friends he referred to were not to be found. The payee on his account was MIA so the man had no money to purchase socks, food, or other items he needed/wanted. It was a rather bleak and dismal picture.

However, in the midst of this a group of individuals learned to love and serve a stranger in ways I never believed I would witness. It was one of the most tender, and loving experiences in my life. I have become a better person because of this experience. In the process I have also improved as a mother and wife.

I am not out to change the world, Rachel. However, I am dedicated to reaching out and helping those around me any way I can. You see, when I look at the big picture I get overwhelmed and yell, "why isn't anyone doing anything about this?!?" However, if I'm busy working in my little realm in life and constantly seeking to stretch my perimeter than I'm more apt to trust that someone else is doing the same thing in their realm.

I have a quote hanging above my kitchen sink;
"A man filled with the love of God, is not content with blessing his family alone, but ranges through the whole world, anxious to bless the whole human race."

One day I might be courageous and ambitious enough to "range through the whole world" but for now I seek for opportunities around me. This year has been expectionally good. Sarah, 5 years old from Mongolia. 23 year old, Bilguun also from Mongolia. Pops, 78 from Chicago. Brian, 53, living in Florida. Well, maybe I'll reach the whole world while it is busy passing though my neighborhood!

Have a good night, dear.

Lara said...

Rachel, you amaze me with your selflessness. Almost since the beginning of knowing you better I've thought of you as being troubled. I don't mean troubled in the way people refer to teenagers, but troubled with the world's huge problems and your puzzlements over humanity and their stupidness. I think I'm just about the complete opposite of you. Perhaps it's my near-hermit lifestyle, but what I think about the most is me and what immediately affects me. I think I've become quite selfish with my thoughts. I haven't been blessed/cursed with your desire to right all wrongs.

When I first started reading this post I thought, "I can't wait to see her conclusion to this problem!" thinking that it would end in a solution. But, like Phaedrus as a college professor in "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance" asking his students to come up with the definition of the idea "quality", you offered no answer, only a genuine question. I have absolutely no wisdom to impart, only wonder at your mind.

Rachel said...

Jenn, Thanks for sharing your experiences. I think you are wise to seek out the opportunities that present themselves to you.
Lara, I wish we lived closer. Abe might get jealous if we spent too much time together, though. ;)

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